distressedude | 015 ~ [Voice]

Entry tags:

015 ~ [Voice]

[For anyone who knows Ion well enough to be considered a friend, or perhaps just well enough to say you've had a conversation with him at some point in the past, you just might catch a filter at some point during the day. It's a small, weak, empty filter and it'll disappear only a few minutes after it's made, so chances are you might miss it. But for those who happen to see it, there's an explanation that follows... though there's no filter here.]

[His voice sounds rather tired, and perhaps a bit sad.]

...when you can't set up a filter to someone, it means they've gone home, doesn't it.

[The way he asks, it sounds like he already knows the answer.]

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What makes you say that?

Prioritizing others over yourself can only lead to bad consequences.

[Good luck trying to convince Ion of that.]

Perhaps, but... rather than dwell on my own loss, I'd rather be happy that he was able to return home.

Then your true sentiment isn't being happy for him in escaping this place, but instead in believing that your loss wasn't for nothing.

Isn't it just as possible for it to be both?

That's simply deceiving yourself.

I disagree. I don't think this situation that could be described as either black or white. It's not that simple.

Even knowing I may never see him again, I'm glad he won't have to go through anymore experiments or pain caused by the Malnosso's hands.

You're a kind person. [though strangely, that doesn't sound like praise coming from her.]

If you truly feel that way... then that's good. You can genuinely find joy in another person's happiness. But what if that came into conflict with your own? What would you do if you had a choice... say you could leave this place in your friend's stead?

[To her credit, he does stop to think about that for a moment... but only a moment. There's no sense of hesitance in his answer.] I would choose to stay.

Why? [a slight frown.] If you're concerned about feeling guilty, you wouldn't remember anything. What sense is there in choosing to stay?

Is it so surprising that someone would sacrifice their own happiness to further that of those they care about?

Surprising, no... But I'm afraid I simply can't approve of that kind of thinking.

I understand. I'm sure there are plenty of people who would disagree with me as well, just as there are those who might agree with me. Not everyone has the same way of thinking, after all.

I can't tell people how to think, nor can I tell them what to do... all I can do is provide suggestions and advice. In this case I would say you need to put more value in your own well-being. Looking after others is fine... but doing it to your own detriment is foolish.

...you're not the first person to tell me that. [With a smile that says she probably won't be the last, either.]

I didn't get a chance to ask your name before. I'm Ion.

Most people are quite set in their ways... it was worth a try all the same.

Mami Tomoe. It's nice to meet you, Ion.

Nice to meet you as well, Mami.

[A pause.] So, what would your answer be? Given your reaction to mine, does that mean you would choose to leave?

[ She hesitates at that; she knows her answer should be yes. It's by far the more logical answer, and saying anything else would be a mistake. Yet even so she can't quite say it... not without some hesitation. ]

I believe that would be the more prudent choice.

[He makes a note of that hesitance. She had sounded so resolute before... but it wasn't exactly an easy question.]

Sometimes the more prudent choice can be the most difficult one to make.

[It would have been far easier if she'd been asked upon her immediate arrival... but now that the one person she'd hesitate to leave behind is here, she can't make the choice so easily.]

That's true, isn't it? People aren't always strictly logical... even when they know they should be.

It's easier to be logical when the most logical outcome is a pleasant one.

To be honest, my answer before may have been a bit deceitful. Staying behind wouldn't really be sacrificing my own happiness. Experiments aside, I like living in Luceti.

[That and he has nothing to return to... but that doesn't need to be said.]

Oh... I see. [ she really hadn't considered that angle herself...

If she were to leave this place... no, could she leave this place? Leaving suggests going somewhere else. But outside of this place, she's already... ]

You have an interesting point. I hadn't really considered it in that light before. I may be better off remaining here as well.

[Normally Ion would be more cautious in asking any further questions after an answer like that. It could potentially be a sore subject, after all. But the way she answered was so calm...]

Why is that? If you don't mind my asking...

I'm not sure I have a place to return to.

[ it's said lightly though... her tone sounds quite forced. ]

[...]

[It wasn't hard to tell what she probably meant. He's used that same phrasing himself, after all.]

...I'm sorry. That was thoughtless of me to ask.

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