distressedude | 028 ~ [Action/Voice]

Entry tags:

028 ~ [Action/Voice]

[ Friday Afternoon - House One ]
[Ever since the day Asch had to carry Ion home after he fell in the middle of the street, he's slowly come to a realization. For the past few days, the duration of time in which Ion was able to stand had only grown shorter and shorter. He can't stand at all without assistance, and that assistance essentially amounts to someone holding him up while his legs hang there, limply. Stairs have quickly become an impossible obstacle for him to overcome, forcing him to relocate to the spare room on the first floor. Now, with a pillow over his face, he laid in bed -- wishing he could fall back asleep so he would have an excuse not to call someone for help in getting up. He wasn't hungry, and in truth he just had no reason to get up and out of bed.]

[He wasn't going to get better. There was no known cure.]

[But that line of thinking wouldn't get him anywhere. It wasn't going to help him get better, and it wouldn't help him face the reality of what's happening to him. He hadn't even told anyone in the House about the diagnosis yet, using his own near-constant fatigue as an excuse to change the subject whenever it came up. And yet he's sure they've noticed something -- a change in him this past week. He hasn't been himself at all, and it seemed like the more he lost the ability to function, the more he lost the ability to care This morning had been no different, with Ion staying in bed well into the afternoon... until he heard something whining softly beside his bed.]

[Peeking out from behind the pillow, he saw the paws and nose of Colonel the puppy, curiously investigating as to why Ion was still in bed at almost 2 in the afternoon. Had someone opened the door for him? Or was he just getting better at getting into every little thing? After another whine and a short bark, Ion reaches out to gently scratch behind his ear, as if to reassure him.]

Did you come to wake me up? I've been awake for awhile now. [His words are met with a puzzled tilt of the head from Colonel.] I'm all right. Just... tired. That's why I'm still in bed, after all.

[With anther whine and a scampering of paws, Colonel bats at the bed again before skittering off to the other side of the room. Folded up by the desk is the wheelchair Ion borrowed from the clinic earlier that week, which has only been used but once. When he turns and barks again, Ion pulls the pillow away from his face and pushes himself upright.]

...what is it? Do you want to play? [An enthusiastic bark.] Why don't you go find Florian? Or Tear? [A whine, and then another bark.] I'm sorry. I can't play with you. [More scampering, and accompanied by a series of loud barks in succession. His patience has worn thin.] Colonel!

[The barking stops. With another soft whine, Colonel lays down and presses his nose to the floor. Ion didn't even realize why until he looked up, seeing the pillow from before in his hand, about to be thrown at the dog. As he lowers the pillow, Colonel perks up immediately and skips back over, paws once more up on the bedside.]

...I'm sorry.

[What was wrong with him? What was he doing?]

I'm so sorry, Colonel.

[It was silly. This was silly. He's already died before. What difference would it make if it happened again?]

I'm sorry... I can't even tell you the truth... can I?

[Since when has he been afraid of death?]

--

[ Saturday - Action / Voice ]
[Today was a new day.]

[For the first time in a long time, Ion got out of bed as soon as he woke up. It took more effort than he'd like to admit, but eventually he leaves his room, wheeling himself along in the wheelchair he borrowed from the clinic. He has only one goal for the day, and that goal is to make today as fundamentally normal for himself as possible. Though still feeling far more tired than usual, without the added strain of trying to force his leg muscles to move, accomplishing that goal actually seems to be within reach.]

[His first stop is the library. It's the place he frequents most often and the trip he knows he'll need to get used to first. Thankfully, these past few weeks of being unable to stand for very long have let him grow accustomed to asking for help reaching the books on the higher shelves. Now, it just means there are a few more rows he needs help with... though on the bright side, the previously inaccessible bottom row was now much easier to reach.]

[From there, he makes his way around to various other parts of the village, sometimes to actually go in but mostly just to get a feel for getting around. The school, Seventh Heaven, the clinic, the plaza... he's not quite brave enough to try venturing much further than that for now, but that was more than enough for one day. He's not exactly a champion of upper-body strength, after all. Before it even starts to get dark, he'll head back to House one.]

--

[Later that night, he pulls out his journal. His voice sounds tired, but his exact mood may be hard to place outside of anyone who knows him very well.]

Perhaps this question is a bit vague... but has anyone ever changed in a way that seemed to be for the worse, only to realize it could potentially be for the better? Not quite a physical change, but... a change in the way you think about certain things.

If you're willing to share, of course.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I know it isn't. It's just... I'm usually not thinking about my health when I have one.

[Which is exactly his reasoning for wanting one right now. Drown his worries in delicious, liquidy ice cream...!]

It's not as though I have them very often. You said yourself that you didn't even know I liked them.

Yeah, but... getting sick isn't a good idea. Even if you don't do it a lot.

Eating more will probably help you feel better after having it.

[ Kohan it's a milkshake not a beer. ]

Not if I end up eating too much. I already don't have much an appetite these days...

[Whiiich he should probably try not to focus too much on, huh.]

...if I eat at least half of the sandwich, would that be enough? [Yes he is asking permission because Kohan is his baby sitter now or something.]

... Yeah. Alright.

[ sob ion stop being not okay. ]

How long has your appetite been... [ not much-y? ]

Perhaps... since I first started getting sick? [It's hard to tell when he's not standing up or wearing tighter clothing, but he has lost a fair amount of weight. It's been well over a month since then, after all. In combination with the miasma, it's actually surprising that it took him this long to become this weak.]

But it's all right. The medication I've been taking helps with that as well, so... it's better than it was before.

... Good.

It can be kind of hard but... try to keep healthy, okay? Every bit can help, so...

[ He worries about you, bro. ]

...you're right. Every little bit does help.

[...which means he really shouldn't order a milkshake, huh. But even now, he can't help but think of it as just one more thing he can't do now that he's sick all the time. But if he does drink it and get sick, he'll only worry Kohan more, won't he? And that's the last thing he wants...]

[Still, it's probably easy enough to tell what's going through his mind as he stares down at the rest of his sandwich, which still has far more to go before it could be considered half eaten.]

... Sorry. ... Never mind. Don't... worry about it.

[ ohgod now he went and made everything terrible forever ]

[At this rate, they're going to just keep upsetting each other every time they talk, huh?]

[He stares down at his plate for a few moments before decidedly pushing it back and looking up at Kohan, his expression stronger than it was moments before.]

...I'm getting a milkshake. And I won't get sick this time. I promise.

[He wasn't going to let this beat him. Maybe it was silly, but... he needed to do something, and right now, everything little thing he couldn't do was stacking against him. He just wanted to treat himself right now. If he can't even manage that...]

... Alright.

[ And Kohan just... takes a bite of his own meal. He doesn't entirely believe Ion, but... he's not going to stop him at this point. ]

[BELIEVE WHAT YOU WANT, KOHAN he orders a (small) vanilla milkshake and when it arrives, his face actually seems to brighten up a bit -- and even more so after he takes a nice long drink, followed by a sigh.]

I needed that... [Probably a lot more than he let on, for that matter.]

... I'm... glad, then.

[ Protip: he doesn't sound too glad. ]

[And he's not making much effort to hide it, is he?]

[Ion doesn't look up, staring at his milkshake for a few more moments... and then taking yet another, very long drink.]

[...]

[It's gone by the time he finishes, setting it down on the table and leaning back with a soft huff. And then a smile.]

See? I told you I wouldn't get sick.

[He's gonna regret that.]

... That was... something. Do you always drink them that fast?

Not... usually, no.

[But he's certainly had some moments. One of which could most likely be attributed to Kohan, albeit indirectly.]

But it was smaller than usual, so I'm sure it won't matter either way.

... Don't you get a brain freeze or anything?

..."brain freeze"? I've never heard of something like that happening before...

Like when you eat something cold too fast, and then you get a sharp pain in your head... You've never had that?

Not at all. I didn't know that could even happen. [How could eating something cold cause a headache? It sounded a little silly.] Has it happened to you?

Yeah... a few times. Seems kind of weird that you haven't heard of it.

There are probably a lot of things I haven't... heard of. [Please don't make him remind Kohan that he's technically only 4.]

[But oh, that pause wasn't exactly intentional. Brain freeze was something Ion wasn't familiar with, but a stomachache certainly was. His arms were already folded on his lap, but he still tightens them against his stomach, leaning forward a bit. He's trying to hide it, really.]

It's not that weird, is it?

Well, how many times have you had milkshakes? Or... ice cream?

[...he actually tries to count at first, but the number is higher than he thought!] Enough times that I think I would remember if I've ever had something like "brain freeze" before.

That's... strange. They were pretty common back... [ nnnot finishing that thought. ] Maybe you just... can't get one, somehow.

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!] 1/2

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaction!]