021 ~ [Voice]

[distressedude]

[Even with the month of February coming to a close, the weather has still been rather cold. But that didn't stop spring from trying to make its way through, and even now, one could see the start of buds on trees around the forest. Appropriately bundled up for the weather, Ion rests at the foot of the largest tree in the cherry tree grove just north of the village. Taking in a long, steady breath, he absentmindedly opens his journal. When he speaks, it doesn't even seem like he's addressing the journal at first. His voice sounds distant; he's had a lot on his mind lately.]

I wonder what it would be like to live in Luceti longer than I lived back on Auldrant... so far. [Those last words are added rather hastily, like an after-thought. There's a wistful smile on his face.] Thinking about it used to make me feel sad... now I'm almost not sure what to think. It feels like the longer I'm here, the greater the chance is that I might start to forget things about home. The sound of the city bustling to life in the morning. The way the sun shines off the fonbelt in the sky at sunset. The faces of all the kind people I've met...

[He trails off before smiling a little more brightly.]

But I guess it really hasn't been all that long. [Two years in Luceti. Almost a year back on Auldrant. Nearly a quarter of the time he's been alive.] Besides, there are things here that I never want to forget as well...

[He trails off and looks off into the distance. The only sound for a few moments is that of birds chirping overhead. Aburptly, he looks back down at the journal.]

Ah. I think I lost track of where I was going with this. I'm sorry for rambling.

Comments

[distressedude]

[Ah, Ion remembered Kohan mentioning the same thing during Valentine's Day. Though at the time, he hadn't asked why...]

Is it because you don't want to forget your memories of Luceti?

[personafalsify]

... Yeah. I've learned... so much here. About myself... as myself. Not as Riku. I don't... want to go back to before. I don't want to go back to being just a fake Riku.

[distressedude]

...perhaps if they did ever find a way to send us back, they could do so without making us lose our memories? They mentioned it being possible to send people to other worlds, after all...

[But even then, Ion isn't sure that'd be an option for himself.]

[At least, not an option he'd consider.]

[personafalsify]

... Still. I don't know if... what if that would change the future that other people know about? What would happen?

[distressedude]

...I don't believe the future to be something set in stone. People have the right to choose their own path.

If knowing the future would cause someone to change that path, then I suppose people from that future would become the results of that change.

[A pause.] But as for what that would mean for those who would be affected... I don't know. Before coming here, I didn't think it would be possible to talk with someone from the past or future.

[personafalsify]

... I didn't, either.

I'm still not sure I'd want to go back. I guess I'd never really thought about whether the future was already decided.

[distressedude]

Perhaps it's not a future that was already decided, but the future people happened to decide for themselves? Simply the result of many possible outcomes...

[A pause.] There are people on Auldrant who believe the world is destined to follow a single path. I've never agreed with that way of thinking myself.

[personafalsify]

It... sort of seems like it, considering there's people from the future here. But why would that matter if you couldn't know the future anyway?

[distressedude]

...but on Auldrant, it is possible. People who are capable of controlling the Seventh Fonon can read something known in my world as the Score. It's a foretelling of the future that promises prosperity for humanity.

[personafalsify]

[ ... oh ]

But then you could choose not to listen to it, right?

[distressedude]

It's only recently that we had been trying to change the world into one that doesn't depend on the Score. But after 2000 years of following it religiously, it makes things difficult for those who don't understand why adhering so strictly to the Score isn't the right path.

And as the Fon Master, it's my duty to help the people find the right path for themselves.

[personafalsify]

The... what?

[ Excuse him bro he is trying to wrap his head around this. ]

[distressedude]

Oh... Fon Master is my title back home. [He didn't talk about this very much, did he? Hm...]

Fon Master Ion was the one chosen by the Score to succeed the previous Fon Master as the leader of the Order of Lorelei, the organization in charge bringing the Score to the people.

[And no, he's not talking about himself in third person here. He is a replica, after all. And for them to have made so many, it should have been safe to assume he was someone important, right?]

[personafalsify]

[ Well Kohan doesn't exactly know how many replicas is par for the course. ]

So... you're in charge of it, but you're trying to get people not to follow it?

[ This is all very very confusing. ]

[distressedude]

That's right. [Or at least, that's as simply an explanation as one can make of it. He's not even going to try and bring Van into this, nope nope.]

The Score promised unprecedented prosperity for mankind... but there are those who believed so strongly in it, they tried to incite war only because the Score predicted it would happen.

I don't think it's right to justify bringing so much suffering on the world for the sake of a prophecy. There's always another way. Another path. That's why I don't believe in a predetermined future...

[A pause, and then softer:] ...that's why I don't want to.

[personafalsify]

... Yeah, I can see that. War... doesn't seem like it could be good for anyone. [ Though really, all of his ideas of what "war" actually means are far-off, textbook sort of descriptions, but Rep still gets that it's usually bad. ]

[distressedude]

No... it is isn't. [He frowns, falling silent for a moment... before shaking his head and looking back up.]

I'm sorry if that all a bit confusing... to be honest, I don't usually talk about Auldrant very much these days. It's... difficult, sometimes, to do so without feeling a bit homesick.

[personafalsify]

... Yeah, I get you. [ Except his home is only in his memories. ] You don't need to talk about it if you don't want.

[distressedude]

...it's not that I don't want to talk about it. I do. It's just... hard. I'd like to think someday it won't be so painful to think about. But I also know ignoring things won't make it any easier...

[personafalsify]

... Did you enjoy it? Before you came here.

[distressedude]

Of course. Thought it may be true that I enjoy living in Luceti, Auldrant... was still my home.

[And yet he might sound just a little unsure about that last point.]

[personafalsify]

... I'm sorry.

Have you... tried going back in the Battledome, yourself? [ He's wondering if that's why Ion got the idea in the first place. ]

[distressedude]

I've thought about it, but... [He trails off. Then shakes his head.]

It's fine. Perhaps I'll get used to it someday. I have to, after all.

[personafalsify]

... You might go back.

[ He says it quietly. It's not something he wants... but he's been in Luceti far to long to pretend that's not something to be considered. He's had important people go home on him before. ]

[distressedude]

[There's a pause. It's a long pause, and perhaps a bit telling. Ion doesn't know what to say to that. What he should say. What he wants to say. The words alone sent an unpleasant chill down his spine, knowing fully well just what "going back" would mean for him.]

[But should he say that? Is that something he really wants to talk about right now? He doesn't know. It had been so hard to tell Luke after keeping it a secret from him for so long. And yet there's still that little part of him that feels grateful, knowing now how much closer it brought them. They swore to never keep things hidden from each other ever again. And though there were still things Ion hasn't told Luke about yet... it was a comfort. And it had been a comfort, to be given the chance to mourn his own fate like that...]

[But it was still painful. So painful. Perhaps even more so for the one who had to hear about it. Would it be right to put some of that pain, that burden, on Kohan as well? Would he be like Luke, angry that he hadn't known before, knowing that his words had been hurting Ion all that time without ever knowing? Would he want to know?]

[When Ion finally finds the will to speak, his voice is soft, and more than a little sad.]

...I hope not.